(Source: kardashiankhaos, via the-ambitious-girl)
The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!
JESUS CRUST.
JAM IT!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”
omfg
ohmygoodgod.
(Source: secretsbest, via eveybaybee)
Whats 20,000 children to a muhfucka like me, cause you please remind me?
Ball so hard, this shit crazy
30 minute youtube video don’t phase me
They killed Osama and Sadam and I’m walking around like shit gravy
Posts on Facebook, this shit weird, my pic ain’t posed to be there
Pyscho, my kids are liable to go Michael … take your pick
Myers, Myers, Myers, they’ll kill with sticksBall so hard, get’em young before they walk, Issue them with standard glocks.
Carl Weathers? That’s Shop’d! Got more kids than Kidz Bop.
Ball so hard, I’m shocked too, I’m supposed to be locked up too
Snatchin’ kids, Like I snatched.
Got toddlers from here to Timbuktuuuuuuu
LMAO , the verses in the note though >
i’m DEAD from “Got more kids than Kidz Bop” LMFAO. this is pure GOLD!
OMG LOOOL THIS IS HILARIOUS, I HAD TO.
wow .. the reality of how WEEEEEAKKKKK I am? THAT SHXT CRAY !
HAD to reblog comments are HILARIOUS
LMFAOOOOOO!!!!
(via 16sn808s)
(via 16sn808s)
(Source: weheartit.com, via s4brin4xo)
(Source: apromiseleft-unbroken, via jamimayyyy)
(via jamimayyyy)
too perfect.
(via serenelyprofound)
